Thursday, May 14, 2009

Life is so fraglie.

It sucks. I've been in this world for 30 years, I've probably met thousands of people in my life. Through different stages of my life I've had different friends, some I'm still very close to, some I just see here and there and some I have not seen in years.

I've gotten to know people through my moms friends and then they lose touch and then so do I. And that is sad. Now. I never thought about it before. I mean really thought about what a risk that is. I take advantage of everyone I have met, I expect to see them again, even if it is 10 years from the last time I saw that. And that is naive. So I should treat every moment with the people in my life like it could be the last? That sounds so impossible, but really what I should do right? If I truly value that person.

So why am I being so morbid you ask? My mom called me to tell me one of the 3 boys I use to babysit...died May 7th. Now before a week ago I didn't think about him since probably the last time I saw him. He was the sweetest kid I'd ever met. Him & his 2 brothers were my favorite people to be around. I adored these guys. They are the reason I wanted 3 boys. They rocked! So last week I was talking to my mom and out of know where was reminded of Ryan and asked if she had heard from his mom and they lost contact. Bummer I thought, sure would be awesome to see what he's up to. I'm not kidding that was our conversation LAST week!

Now today he's not here anymore. I haven't been able to stop thinking about him. Life. Death. Chance. So I decided to type out my feelings. They probably make no sense but I need this and it's my blog. Ha!

I'm not sure what to make of today now. So I'm sorry to Ryan's family for their loss and I will be praying for you.